Dear Sir: Raising A Son With Special Needs

Willie recently moved home from his residential and day programs due to emotional and verbal abuse. This letter is my response to what happened to him under their care:

Dear Sir:

Thank you for screwing up my kid. You made him so afraid that now he keeps thinking he isn't safe anywhere. You talked to and viewed him like he was a violent, out of control person, and now he thinks he is that. You told him he belongs in a mental ward and he believed you. You told him that the you would call 911 on him. But you never did. You only threatened, which is more intimidating and WRONG. You joked with him that every time a siren went by, that they were coming for him.  Now when he hears a siren, he freaks out. You told your friends on the phone that you couldn't hang out with them because you had to take care of a mentally retarded 24 year old.  He heard you say that.  Remember his ears were not broken too.  Now he quotes you all the time as he puts himself down.

He has regressed. He has PTSD.  He is traumatized, as someone would be who suffered from emotional and verbal abuse.  He has painful flashbacks. He is suffering. He is wondering why.

Dear Sir:

I hate you. And I wish I could tell him why you did these things.  Do you even know?

Passover: Raising A Son With Special Needs

Ask any Jewish person, and they'll tell you missing Seder with 15 of your nearest and dearest is heartbreaking. Ask any Special Needs parent, and they'll tell you missing something this important due to your Disabled child is equally devastating.

I've been feeling very sorry for myself. The idea of driving anywhere with Willie in the car with our family is impossible, as he heals from his latest, very real, trauma. Thus the journey to Connecticut to celebrate Passover with my large, extended family, a yearly tradition, was squashed.  

You can ask any Special Needs parent again, do they ever learn anything wonderful from having their Disabled child in their life? Sometimes the answer is yes.

I was going to skip doing a home Seder entirely, as my husband is out of town, and I just don't have the energy. My 14-year-old daughter, however, yesterday told me she had other plans. And so I went to the grocery store to gather the items for the Seder plate and for making Charosets, (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charoset )a time honored tradition and necessity for any Seder. I then taught that lovely girl had to make that Charosets. We assembled the Seder plate. She is in charge of leading what will mostly be a very short Seder. 

I'm done feeling sorry for myself. Sure, I miss all my lovely family celebrating Passover tonight, I will miss all those amazing traditions, songs, and inside jokes. But thanks to Willie, my daughter has made what could've been a sad evening, something full of hope. Her middle name is Hope. She lives up to that word every single day.

Welcome to Voices of Special Needs Blog Hop -- a monthly gathering of posts from special needs bloggers hosted by The Sensory Spectrum and The Jenny Evolution. Click on the links below to read stories from other bloggers about having a special needs kiddo -- from Sensory Processing Disorder to ADHD, from Autism to Dyslexia! Want to join in on next month's Voices of Special Needs Hop? Click here!

http://www.thesensoryspectrum.com/sensory-bloggers-blog-hop-information/