Idiosyncrasies: Raising A Son With Special Needs

I prefer to view Willie's idiosyncrasies as just that, not signs of Autism, symptoms of OCD, or other such stigmatized terms. The power of the words we use when thinking about our children with special needs is worth paying attention to. I could easily scoff off all of Willie's strange habits with psychiatric labels, but I chose to think of them differently. I try to embrace them and sometimes even rejoice in these peculiarities.

Today I want to share Willie's strong interest in duct tape and electrical wires. When Willie is on his own at his day program and they go on a outing, he always comes home with duct tape. And not just any duct tape, but colorful, shiny, and patterned rolls. Willie also worries that his charger to his iPad is constantly breaking. His way to solve this problem is to wrap the charger in duct tape. I say nothing for Willie has figured out his own solution to this concern.  I say nothing as there is very little Willie can control in his daily life. I say nothing as what's wrong with obsessively wrapping wires in duct tape?

Eventually these cords get heavy, Willie decides they no longer work, and he instantly NEEDS a new one.  I buy him a new one. I hate to do so, but Willie again struggles daily with a semi-broken body and mind, and yearns to be a typical 24 year old young man. So the least I can do is to keep my mouth shut about his need to wrap his cords in duct tape month after month. And then when he requests a new cord, I owe it to Willie to comply with this very simple wish.

I chuckle out loud now when I see the duct tape remnants everywhere, spy the many extension cords he constantly buys from the thrift store, and watch myself patiently attempting to remove that tightly wrapped tape from the iPad chargers that still work. I could be angry and say something derogatory to Willie about all of these habits. Believe me I want to plenty of the time. Instead I am working on shifting my view and celebrating these idiosyncrasies. Most days....